


Invasion of the Dib-Snatchers

by meependa (Hawkbringer)



Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alien Biology, Aliens Made Them Do It, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Blow Jobs, Dubious Consent, Frenemies, Hand Jobs, M/M, Mood Swings, Nipple Play, No Refractory Period, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, References to Pornography Watching, Rough Kissing, ZaDr, ball-licking, of course they did, science doesn't work like that, the alien was zim, zim tops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-20 16:18:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17025993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hawkbringer/pseuds/meependa
Summary: Vintage ZADR porn featuring intermittent GIR interruptions. (Written during that inevitable Tim Burton/Jhonen Vasquez phase so many fan-lings go through in middle school, in my case, mid-2007.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It seems I wrote this over multiple days, the form changes dramatically as it goes, so I decided to split it into chapters. Written approximately 10th of August 2007. Dub-con is the name of the game with this pairing, do take care. It is technically unfinished, and may be adopted if anyone wishes.

Gir-"How did you get in here??"  
Zim-"For the hundreth time, GIR, you left the window open. I just jumped through."  
Dib-"Seriously, tho, why couldn't you have used the door?"  
Zim-"DIB!!!" (blushes furiously)  
Dib-"...."  
GIR-"........."  
Zim-"...."  
GIR-".....TACOOOOOOSS!!!"

Zim and Dib turn to him, glaring.

GIR-"Happy taco man! (refering to Zim) How did you get in here??"  
Zim- frustrated sigh, rubs non-existent eyebrows

Gir- runs off screaming, singing in background  
Dib- "Why'd you blush like that?"  
Zim- looks up, glaring furiously.  
Dib- shrugs with hands in pockets "I'm just asking."  
Zim- "It's always 'just asking' with you, Dib-worm. Barely-innocent questions muttered under your filthy, pig-stinky breath! They mean nothing to the IRKEN ARMY!!"  
Dib- "Brave talk. Care to back it up?"  
Zim- "Heh?"  
Dib- "How do I know you're not recording this whole thing on your (does air quotes) 'computer' somewhere, and are gonna turn it in to the police to make good on that restraining order GIR filed 3 months ago?"  
Zim- "Restraining order?"  
Dib- "Oops.."  
Zim- "Explain to me the particulars of this 'restraining order' of yours..."  
Dib- stubborn silence  
Zim- eye twitch, pulls out spider legs. 

SFX- 'shhhek' 

Zim- "Hah! Puny human! You have no more excuse of your filthy-headed bigness to protect you now!" (reference to Halloween of Doom) Advances on Dib from 4 feet up.  
Dib- at last second before he's impaled thru the heart, whips out a piece of paper.

SFX- crrrunch.

Zim- ".....heh?"  
Dib- smirk. " _This_ is a restraining order, Zim. I got one 3 months ago after I hypnotized GIR into telling me about _your_ restraining order against _me_. Now we're even." Still smirking.

SFX- steaming rage

ZIM- FILTHY HUMAN BALL OF SHIT!! YOU THINK YOU CAN GET EVEN WITH ZIM!!! I WILL ALWAYS TAKE REVENGE!! ALWAAAAY--"  
Dib- grabs spider leg and pulls it, wanting Zim on the ground.  
Zim- pulls 2nd spider leg back, ready to impale Dib.  
Dib- raises hand at last second.


	2. Chapter 2

PREVIOUSLY ON, INVASION OF THE DIB-SNATCHERS....

ZIM- FILTHY HUMAN BALL OF SHIT!! YOU THINK YOU CAN GET EVEN WITH ZIM!!! I WILL ALWAYS TAKE REVENGE!! ALWAAAAY--"  
Dib- grabs spider leg and pulls it, wanting Zim on the ground.  
Zim- pulls 2nd spider leg back, ready to impale Dib.  
Dib- raises hand at last second.

*comic book-style view from side, black outlines*

SFX- shhokk, blood dripping from hand  
Dib- leaking tears at the pain.  
Dib- opens eyes, "Why, Zim? Why do you want to kill me? Why have you tried twice, _today,_ already? Last time--"  
Zim- "Enough talking about last time! This is _this_ time, and you won't bring me there again!"  
Dib- raises hand to Zim's face.   
Zim- on guard, ready to swat human's hand.

Dib- "Ah, ah, ah, Zim! If you touch me, that restraining order of yours is good as dead."  
Zim- gloved fingertip milimeter from Dib's hand. "Explain..."  
Dib- "Fine. (hand falls, Zim's falls) A restraining order is a piece of paper signed by someone in _government_ (word drips with disdain), and it means that whomever's name is on that paper isn't allowed to come within whatever distance of you. The signed name is just there to validate it."  
Zim- "How far did you put on _your_ paper?"  
Dib- Grins down at their hands, Dib inching closer "3 inches."  
Zim- "huuuh? I would have put 700 katrillion inches if your puny planet had that much mass! Not that it's any of my _superior_ business, but why didn't _you?_ "  
Dib- still grinning. "Ask GIR what he put on _yours._ "

Zim- one eyebrow up at the grin, turns head. "GIR!!!!"  
Gir falls from ceiling in red mode. "Yes, my master!?"  
Zim- "Divulge the particulars of the restraining order against the _DIB_!  
Gir- salutes, goes back to blue mode, digs around in his head, pulls out soggy piece of paper, offering no explaination as to the soggy-ness.

Zim- takes it with tips of fingers, with exaggeratedly wary face. Zim is silent as he reads it.  
Zim- lekku perk up. "HUUH??? GIR!! Explain this monstrosity piece of human _filth!!_  
GIR- (red mode)*Yes master!* (turns to blue) EEEEET'S A TACO!!  
Zim- "ugh... DIB!! Make your stinking self useful and explain this... _thing_... to ZIM!"  
Dib- snatches paper with ugly look at Zim. Reads it. Eyebrows shoot up. "HUUH?"  
Zim- "What? What? What is it, what! Start the talking with your smelly-flappy mouth!"  
Dib- rolls eyes at Zim, turns paper toward camera. Sheet says, "The human DIB(Kiddie handwriting on blank line) is not allowed within 5 inches of Invader ZIM. So says (underlined signature of random government official). This restraining order shall stay valid until ~~~~ (unreadable printed date) 

Dib- "Hey... Isn't that first number.. _this_ month??"   
Zim- "Hey... Yeah, it is! Huh! Would ya lookat that?"  
Gir- making kissy noises in background

Both- Turn towards each other then to GIR.   
GIR- Is playing with class pictures of Zim and Dib, smushing the faces together to kiss.   
Both- blush outrageously, then double over in mock nausea.  
Dib- "Arggh, my eyes!" Clutches them.  
Zim- "Oh, my squeedily-spooch!" proceeds to mock barf.

Dib shoots him a look of faint disgust, muttering, "You don't need to go _that_ far."  
Zim straightens up quickly. "What? Is the _Dib_ accusing _Zim_ of falsity, when it is the _Dib_ that is lying about _his_ restraining order??"  
Dib- "I'm not lying - you are! You know we don't _really_ hate it when GIR does that! Personally, I-"  
Zim- :ignore: "La-la-la-la!! I'm not listening! Nope! Not at all listening to the the Dib-worm and his insecent chattering _lies_!!!"  
Dib- :shakefist: "I know you like it! I _know_ you do!! You can't hide it from me!! _I_ know what you do when you're all alone! I know what you did last _summahh_!!" (Zim still babbling in background until last sentence)  
Zim- slowly takes hands off of place where ears would be. "You... _know_??" sounding very lost, he walks closer.

Dib- nodding proudly at his victory, gives very surprised face when Zim clutches his shirt and drags it down with him, kneeling on the floor.   
Dib- standing at weird angle, Zim's face in his shirt, asks, "um.. what do you think I know?"  
Zim- looks up, face almost black (not purple) with shame, face screwed up with puckery mouth "Ohhhh, no, Dib-worm! If I am wrong about this, if you _are_ lying once again, you will learn _nothing_ from this experience. You hear me?? NOTHING!! MUAHAAHAHAHAHA!!!" Buries face in shirt again. 

Dib- now wincing madly, "I know.... that you watch porn late at night... from monitoring your computer.... Why is that such a huge secret?"  
Zim- looks up "Oh, just the porn? Okay, then. Yah, okay. That's good. I mean, that's... yeah, good." Stands up, starts smoothing Dib's shirt.

Dib- eye twitches. "WHAT DID YOU THINK I KNEW??? IF SOMETHING SO OUT THERE AS THE _PORN_ THING WOULD MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER, WHAT DID YOU _THINK_ I KNEW???"  
Zim- smirks "I told you, you will learn nothing from this!! NOTHING!!"  
Dib- sigh. "if you're not going to tell me, I'll find out for myself!" Lunges forward.  
Zim- squeals as he's tackled to floor.

Zim- blushing purplish again, squirming under Dib.  
Dib- panting in Zim's face, eyes shining, face red.  
Zim- eyes bug out for a second, "What is THAT??"  
Dib- looks over shoulder. "Wut?"  
Gir falls from celing at best possible moment, knocking Dib out.  
Zim- "Phew! Now, Gir, get this filthy Huuman off me!!! Gir!!... Gir?"  
Gir has mysteriously disappeared.

Zim- blushes madly again. starts muttering to self as he shoves human off him. pauses, looks down at human's pants. Grins. Starts laughing. "Heh-heh-heh... HAHAHAHAHAH- MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!" Clamps mouth shut, not wanting to wake Dib. Laughs quieter.  
Snickering to self as he snaps fingers. Wires curl round the human, dragging him to ceiling, lost from sight.  
Zim- red eyes glowing, narrowed. Teeth in big sneer.


	3. Chapter 3

PREVIOUSLY ON, INVASION OF THE DIB-SNATCHERS...

Zim- eyes bug out for a second, "What is THAT??"  
Dib- looks over shoulder. "Wut?"  
Gir falls from celing at best possible moment, knocking Dib out.  
Zim- "Phew! Now, Gir, get this filthy Huuman off me!!! Gir!!... Gir?"  
Gir has mysteriously disappeared.

Zim- blushes madly again. starts muttering to self as he shoves human off him. pauses, looks down at human's pants. Grins. Starts laughing. "Heh-heh-heh... HAHAHAHAHAH- MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!" Clamps mouth shut, not wanting to wake Dib. Laughs quieter.  
Snickering to self as he snaps fingers. Wires curl round the human, dragging him to ceiling, lost from sight.  
Zim- red eyes glowing, narrowed. Teeth in big sneer.  
#########################  
System Reloading.... Please wait for response....  
#########################

Total blackout. That was the first thing Dib thought when consciousness vaguely returned. The game begins.. that was his second thought. Wait, where did that come from? Dib opened his eyes. Couldn't see a damn thing. Cept for... wait... this wasn't his room! And what was that pink and green blur with sharp teeth above him? Sharp teeth?! 

"Zim!" The alien grins ever wider, and repeats, "The game begins."

Dib struggles to sit up. "What game? Where are we? What... why aren't you wearing-"

Zim presses gloved finger to lips, quieting him. "The question is now Dib, do you agree?"

"How can I agree? You haven't even told me-"

Zim presses finger against lips again. "Do.. you.. agree?" Something menacing in his voice this time. Dib gulps. Thinking, what could he mean? The game? in him? in general? What-? Then it came to him. Looks up, very certain. 

"No."

Zim snarls, face contorts. Then relaxes. goes slightly superior/smug. "Hmm. Okay... we'll make... exceptions." 

Dib asks quietly, conspiritorially, "Exceptions to what?"

"To the world," gesturing around, looking up. Dib is silent for once.

"Good. You are silent. We can begin."

"Begin what?"

"The game," as if this is the most obvious thing in the world. Before Dib can speak again, Zim swoops in and clasps both shoulders. Dib gasps, then his breath is stolen in a chaste kiss. Before he can react, it is broken, but something else is created. 

Dib raises a hand to his mouth, but Zim catches it before it reaches his lips, rubs the side of his face along it, eyes closed, mouth slightly open. Dib tries to snatch hand back, faintly disgusted. Zim doesn't like that, crushes his fingers in a death grip. "D'you know how long I've waited to experience this? One puny human's wishes will not obstruct the way of this Irken's lust."

Dib's eyes widen, hand is dropped. "Lust? For what? I- I should shut up, shouldn't I?"

Zim cocks his head. "Yes, you really should."

"Only one way to do that now," a grin faintly seen on his face. Taking that grin as encouragement, Zim climbs up by Dib's side, falls gracefully towards Dib's mouth, misses. Twitches face lightly, reaches a gloved hand up to tilt head towards him. Dib, trying to get back some control, roughly meets the alien's next kiss, pushing his tongue against non-existent lips, slicing it up a bit on the sharp teeth. Zim opens his mouth completely, tasting human blood for the first time. Serpentine tongue curls around in other's mouth, loving the twitching of the being beneath him. 

Dib, not expecting the alien to react so positively, raises eyebrows, but continues with his tongue, halting when the alien's reaches around his own, brushing faintly, to trace the edge of his wet mouth. The sensation is odd, different than any mouth he could have imagined, and the tongue is burning in the water of his saliva, bubbling and hissing rather disturbingly against his inner flesh. He knows not to pull away, tho.

Zim's hands begin to roam over the human's fleshy form, noting every wrinkle, rise and indent of the flesh, every hair, pore and- hello, this is odd! His gloved fingers trace over the edges of the human's chest, and small nubs of flesh change shape under his digits. He slows his exploration, and focuses his fingertips on this area of flesh. Dib begins to moan into the other's mouth, swept away by the sensation, forgetting who is giving it to him, taking it from him.

_Hmm... the Dib-creature seems to enjoy the tongue, I wonder...._ and the alien leaves the other's mouth, allowing the gasps and shudders to echo in the small, darkened room. Zim closes his eyes for a second, thoroughly turned on by the sounds. He then turns back to the person beside him, noticing one last thing before completely tearing off the other's shirt- the pants. Something odd about them. Hmnnn, yes, well... we'll see about that later. yes, we shall see...

Dib hisses with a grin as shirt slithers off his sides, deep blue fabric ripped along the seams by expert instruments. Zim revels in the exposed flesh, identifying the trigger points of the human, the nubs of darker flesh. Zim happily seizes them between black-gloved fingers and squeals as the human gasps, eyes thrown open.   
Zim's body goes hot all over as the color of those wide eyes burn against his own barely-clothed body. Legs shuddering, needing to move, Zim bounces lightly up the human's legs, noting the slight swoop of the crotch as he comes upon it, the Dib moaning worse, more, as Zim bounces along its length. 

Zim's eyebrows knit and his face turns intense as a very odd sensation brushes against his own inner thighs. The swoop Zim is ascending now is growing ever thicker, _moving_ against him as he bounces. Intrigued, Zim goes no farther and bounces harder, needlessly, purely to witness Dib's reaction. And what a reaction he gives! Dib is obviously very affected by what Zim does to that swoop (as he has named it) because as Zim's ministrations continue, the human's face begins to twitch in intense pleasure, which Zim mistakes for pain. And Zim likes pain. 

Hissing in pleasure himself now, Zim's fingers leave the abused nipples- for now. They will be back, Zim promises himself, but for now... Sliding his glove-tips just barely against the flesh of the one beneath him as he traces up, up the human's arms, he grins evilly, sliting his eyes at the vibrating shudders the sensitive human makes below him. Applying the barest of pressure (Zim can be quite gentle when it suits him), the alien teases the human's groping arms up over his head, crossing the wrists and pinning them with one lithe hand. 

The other drifts back down, smoothing sweaty Dib-hair, tracing past glassy, open eyes, still burning. Zim's own chest begins to ache at the sight. 

Open-handed, palm flat, the Irken's unoccupied hand slides tantalizingly slowly down, across the heaving chest, noting the new beads of burning-water sweat that have sprung up since his ascension. Tracing the barest hint of muscles under the pallid skin, the bound human pants harder as the hand approaches the navel, passes it and continues downward, pressing against sweaty, soaked pants. The human cries out sharply as Zim makes an obvious move for the other's 'swoop.' 

"Oh?" states Zim innocently, the first word in long minutes of silence. "What is wrong, Dib-human? Do you not wish me to continue? I admit, I am rather enjoying myself... enjoying _you._ " With his last words, the alien bends down and slithers his tongue expertly over the distinct human nose and teasingly around red, puffy lips. The human merely whimpers as the contact is withdrawn, eyes silently pleading for more, which Zim gives him graciously.

One now very curious hand smooths decadently over the simple fabric of jeans, following the straining curve of the swoop from its tented tip down to the base, pressing pointed fingers against the sides of this new development. On a whim, Zim, coming back to the top, hooks his fingers around the zipper and yanks it down, freeing the top button with his other hand, deeming it more needed here than there. Dib's eyes widen again, tilting downward in alarm as the unwelcome sensation of temperature grazes him. "Zim!" he gasps as the alien's hand dives downward under his safety barrier, pulling out his throbbing, heated flesh and curling his entire gloved hand around it. 

Making little pleased noises, oblivious to the human's torment, the alien sticks out his tongue a bit and begins playing with the wettened member, trading it from hand to hand, swirling his fingers round the spongy tip. Dib suddenly makes a much louder noise, practically a scream, and Zim's head snaps up, spared from being hit in the eye as Dib climaxes in the other's hands. As it is, Zim's chest still gets splattered and his neck as well. 

Zim, not noticing this, simply pouts at the loss of his new toy, for, after the whitish explosion, the hardness has waned, a fraction of its former self. Brusquely ignoring the human's panting and half-hearted protests, he painstakingly curls both hands around the human again, and strokes him, _hard._ Again screaming with ecstasy, the human throws his head back and begins to thrust blindly against the foreign touch he wants so much. 

The alien chuckles and obliges, knitting his own fingers together into a passage that Dib eagerly penetrates, wet now and fast arising. Occasionally puffing breaths of air, the human, for the most part, refrains from breathing. Zim notices this and shrugs it off as just another fetish. He has already determined that he himself is one...

Laughing as the human thrusts one last time into withdrawing hands, Zim merely pats him on the cheek, much like a parent consoling a disappointed child. "There, there, Dib-worm. You have had your fun! And now, it is my turn..." Licking lips and setting his sights for Dib's nether regions, Zim wonders what the human will do if he touches him there, with his _tongue_...

Purely for experimental purposes, Zim cuts off his drawing in a breath, open-mouthed, hunting for Dib's scent, and pretends to ponder for a moment. Dib makes no move beneath him as the alien, obviously for show, taps a finger against a twisted mouth, eyes glittering as he comes to a decision. A truly unhealthy sneer adorning precious lips that come into contact with Dib's, the alien reaches down, prostrating himself over the Dib's own sweaty body, and places his lips over Dib's own. His tongue slithers insistently at the joining, an order for entrance hidden by a request. Dib has to wonder why Zim is asking him like that. He _could_ just take me! But that would only be half as fun, Dib concludes, rolling eyes behind closed lids, than to take me, beat me on my _own_ grounds. Play the game so well, he beats me at my own. Smiling now against the erotic tongueplay, Dib thinks, I must be quite the challenge. Hmm, lucky me... 

His thoughts mirror his dominator's as their tongues swirl within the potion-mouth, one burning, the other churning as both bake to perfection. Zim, brows furrowed, draws out, questioning and doubt written all over his face. Suspiciously, Dib looks on. He's never been _that_ easy to read. Another act? But Zim opens his mouth and Dib knows it isn't.

"Dib-human? Why do you not resist? You always resist me in some form or fashion... always... So, why not now?"

Anticipating this question, Dib knows the answer. "I always resist, Zim, when I think I can win." A light smile, a caressing hand on cheek accompany such soft words. "With this, with you, I've already lost. Submitting is my way of giving up. You've won, Zim. You've won me." Zim's regretful, sad face is broken, as cloud cover is broken by the sun, as lekku perk up, noticing one word out of the soothing jumble. 

"Submit? You submit already, human? But we've just begun..." And Zim leans in again with another evil, sickly smile that gives Dib a thrill of arousal he gladly allows to wash over him.

Zim decides now would be a good time to try out his new 'trick,' especially with Dib all submitting and stuff now...

Tongue hanging threateningly out of his mouth, Zim curls in on himself, leaving the human's face and chest, prising the human's legs open and settling himself down between. Placing one hand on either hip, the tightly-curled alien relaxes out again, spreading himself out along the contours of the larger's legs, adding an extra trailing hand along the inner line, just for the shivers. Tongue still out, one corner of his mouth raises, a small smile. Well-placed and going nowhere, the alien turns his intensity to the human's pleasure organs. 

Much like all the others of his species, this human is rather furry, and he looks so soft, even as the lengthy hardness twitches nervously from the proximity of appraising eyes. Ruby orbs trail over the steeled flesh, remembering what it felt like, slick and throbbing, in his hand. Zim smiles happily, then focuses attention on the spheres beneath it. Like most of those of the male's age, they are not so defined, roundness is evident but not pronounced, and the furriness would probably be like silk, a foreign fabric Zim has never touched, but as roaming hands determine, he wouldn't need to to know its legendary softness. 

The silky decadence Zim encounters suspended against the human fills him with the need to touch... by mouth. Taste, as it were. Test. Always the scientist, Zim advances tongue-first, tracing the inner outlines of the spheric organs, losing himself in the rhythm of the blood pulsing beneath his tongue. Licking a steady trail upwards, the more hedonistic of the two curls his tongue deftly around the girth, modest as it is. For a mere child, Zim is impressed, but Dib has let on that he already knows more than he should, for his age. 

Dib's eyes are clenched shut, face screwed up as friction and pressure and _Zim_ and, and, ...patience flees him. "Zi-mah!" Dib gasps out, adding extra emphasis on the last syllable. "More," Dib calls hoarsely, eyes and expression and chest and throbbing and, and, ...too much for Zim. The alien complies. 

Hands curving up to where hips flare, they dig in for stability. A mouth opens wide and Zim almost shudders, preparing for more hot, hissing pain-on-pleasure. What he gets is far better. 

"Ooohh-oohhh-ho! Ooooohhh..." Dib gasps, nearly hiccuping with pleasure as the heat of another engulfs him, the heat of _Zim,_ no less. Teeth are carefully exempted from this operation as the alien attempts to drag the human all the way down his throat. Coming to the conclusion that this will be nearly impossible at roughly the same time, Zim draws out over him, playing a more comfortable three inches with his tongue like a flute. Judging by the noises, Dib enjoys being played. 

What a handsome instrument, Zim muses, releasing the warmth to admire it. Zim returns his attention to it on the insistence of the other male, an order growled thru gritted teeth. Zim holds no ill against him for it, tho, as the boy returns to complacency easily, just a few licks up the sides does the trick. 

Dib seems to enjoy being licked, but Zim decides to humor him again, sensing the tension below him coming toward climax once again. "Shall I continue, master, or do you wish to finish yourself?" Zim asks with the snooty air of an imaginary butler which brings an incredulous smile to Dib's lips. 

"I'll do it myself, thanks, I know how."

"I'll bet you do," is his only response. Dib is about to ask if Zim wished to watch, but the fixated gaze of the other was answer enough. Mentally shrugging, Dib flutters his hands down his body, stopping low down at hips. He closes his eyes from here on out, because that is how he always does it. Even in the dark, tho, he can't hide from the alien's prying eyes.


End file.
